A string walks into a bar and asks for a drink
The bar tender replies" we dont serve strings in here"
The string all upset goes outside and ties himself in knots and tangles himself beyond recognition.
the string goes back into the bar and ask for a drink again.
The bar tender says with question. " arent you the same string that was in here a few minutes ago"?
The string replies " NO Im a fraid knot"!
A termite goes into the bar and says "HEY wheres the Bartender"!
hahahahaha justa couple
O/T What's your favorite joke?
Moderator: Excalibur Marketing Dude
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
Dedicated.... ta all the sweet Bucks yet ta die!
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
What do you call a good turkey gun?
Too easy
Too easy
Exocet 200
gt lazer 2 [turkey] gt lazer 4 [deer]
wasp sst hammers
groundpounder
lumizone
ff string
gt lazer 2 [turkey] gt lazer 4 [deer]
wasp sst hammers
groundpounder
lumizone
ff string
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
Two Irishmen walk out of a bar.........
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bcmuledeer
- Posts: 442
- Joined: Sun Feb 06, 2011 7:02 pm
- Location: Northern B.C.
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
An elderly couple is about to celebrate their 50 anniversary , the old gal says to her hubby. Do you remember the 1st breakfast we had together?
He says he thinks so.
She replies, we had breakfast and we both were naked!
That's right he said.
The old gal with a twinkle in her eye said let's do that tomorrow morning and rekindle the spark.
The next morning there sitting at the table eating breakfast in the nude, she shyly looks at him and says, I think it's working, I'm getting hot and My nipples are on fire!
He looks at her and replies:
That's cause ones hanging in your coffee and the others in your oatmeal
He says he thinks so.
She replies, we had breakfast and we both were naked!
That's right he said.
The old gal with a twinkle in her eye said let's do that tomorrow morning and rekindle the spark.
The next morning there sitting at the table eating breakfast in the nude, she shyly looks at him and says, I think it's working, I'm getting hot and My nipples are on fire!
He looks at her and replies:
That's cause ones hanging in your coffee and the others in your oatmeal
Life is good, treat with respect and honour!
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
A pirate walks into a bar,...with a big ship's wheel sticking out of his pants !!.. The bartender says... hey, ... what's
with the steering wheel... the Pirate says....." Yargh..... it's driven' me nuts" !!
Chaser
with the steering wheel... the Pirate says....." Yargh..... it's driven' me nuts" !!
Chaser
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
O.K. one more
A solo biker comes to a new city and wants to join this local bike gang. The president says ' well,.. we need to see how tough you are first, here's 3 tasks you must complete in these three rooms.
first room you must drink 24 beer in 1 hour
second room is our pit-bull with an abscessed tooth you have to remove the tooth
third room is one of our biker babes who none of the guys have been able to ' satisfy romantically' if ya know what I mean. You must satisfy her !
The new guy goes in the first room and comes out 30 minutes later and lets out a long belch ; BRRRAAAAAAP ! " good beer' He goes in the second room... All of sudden there's all this barking and growling and snarling and barking, more snarling and then a whimper... the guy comes out of the room his clothes all shredded and says ' O.K. WHERE'S THAT WOMAN WITH THE ABSCESSED TOOTH '
chaser
A solo biker comes to a new city and wants to join this local bike gang. The president says ' well,.. we need to see how tough you are first, here's 3 tasks you must complete in these three rooms.
first room you must drink 24 beer in 1 hour
second room is our pit-bull with an abscessed tooth you have to remove the tooth
third room is one of our biker babes who none of the guys have been able to ' satisfy romantically' if ya know what I mean. You must satisfy her !
The new guy goes in the first room and comes out 30 minutes later and lets out a long belch ; BRRRAAAAAAP ! " good beer' He goes in the second room... All of sudden there's all this barking and growling and snarling and barking, more snarling and then a whimper... the guy comes out of the room his clothes all shredded and says ' O.K. WHERE'S THAT WOMAN WITH THE ABSCESSED TOOTH '
chaser
Last edited by chaser on Sun Apr 17, 2011 7:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
Financial Planning
Gerry was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business.
When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a wife with which to share his fortune.
One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary man," he said to her, but in just a few years, my father will die, and I'll inherit $200 million."
Impressed, the woman obtained his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.
Women are so much better at financial planning than men.
Gerry was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business.
When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a wife with which to share his fortune.
One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary man," he said to her, but in just a few years, my father will die, and I'll inherit $200 million."
Impressed, the woman obtained his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.
Women are so much better at financial planning than men.
Some people just like stepping on rakes
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
2007 Phoenix
Custom Wood Stock
Gold Tip II 311 Grain
Meat Seeker, 3 blade, Mechanical 100 Grain
Boo Astroflight String
Varizone Sighting
Custom Wood Stock
Gold Tip II 311 Grain
Meat Seeker, 3 blade, Mechanical 100 Grain
Boo Astroflight String
Varizone Sighting
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
Two Arkies are out deer hunting and sit down to take a break. Off in the distance is a bridge over a huge gorge.
There's folks bungee jumping off the bridge. One hillbilly asks the o0ther "Y'all ever tried that"?
"Nope, ain't gonna neither. Came into this world because of a busted rubber, ain't chancing goin out the same way"
There's folks bungee jumping off the bridge. One hillbilly asks the o0ther "Y'all ever tried that"?
"Nope, ain't gonna neither. Came into this world because of a busted rubber, ain't chancing goin out the same way"
"Eze 18:21"
Re: O/T What's your favorite joke?
A priest is visiting an all girls catholic school. The girls are all lined up to meet him. "What's your name little girl?" he asks the first girl. "Mary" she replies. "Oh, that's a great name, and what are you going to be when you grow up Mary?" the priest continues, "A Nun, father, I'm going to help the poor people", says Mary. "Wonderful" is the priest's response.
The next girl's name is Naomi, and being a name from the bible the priest likes it too, and when Naomi says that she is going to be a nurse and help the sick people, the priest is suitably impressed. This goes on for a while until the priest comes to the last girl. "What's your name little girl?" the priest asks. "Roxanne" replies the girl, while spitting out a chew, rather shocking the priest, but he carries on. "And what are you going to be when you grow up?" he continues. "A prostitute" she answers. "A what?" is all the priest can say. "A prostitute" Roxanne repeats. "Oh, thank God for that" says the priest "at first I thought you said a protestant."
The next girl's name is Naomi, and being a name from the bible the priest likes it too, and when Naomi says that she is going to be a nurse and help the sick people, the priest is suitably impressed. This goes on for a while until the priest comes to the last girl. "What's your name little girl?" the priest asks. "Roxanne" replies the girl, while spitting out a chew, rather shocking the priest, but he carries on. "And what are you going to be when you grow up?" he continues. "A prostitute" she answers. "A what?" is all the priest can say. "A prostitute" Roxanne repeats. "Oh, thank God for that" says the priest "at first I thought you said a protestant."